White coat. Heels.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize