What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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