Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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