put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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