fuck your aforementioned shoe
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I got inside last night via doggy door
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
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