I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Drunk is a universal language darling
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
