Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
