i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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