.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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