Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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