Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
