I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
