Just cropdusted the office
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
