remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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