I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Randomize
