Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize