hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
