We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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