yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
It's never too late to be topless.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
