I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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