The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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