he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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