guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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