I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize
