Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize