i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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