my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
