is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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