She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
