please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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