You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
