She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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