Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
