i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
