you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
