I want to walk on stilts...naked
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
