Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
tell me about the eggs
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
