Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
