currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I don't want my vagina anymore.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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