How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
