You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
When did angry sex become our thing?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize