quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize