if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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