I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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