too bad you live with your parents still
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
