He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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