Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Randomize
