I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize