my room smells like sperm. sweet.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
