This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
