If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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