I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
well I can't set my house on fire every night
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
